suicide notes

2008-02-06T10:18:00.001-08:00

Haha changed a bit of my template. Cheers. Its kinda sad. So many things happen in my life yet i am reluctant to pen it down. Must be a lack of visually kinesthetic incentive for me to do so ;)

Anyway, juz a quick update. I really enjoy going around schools as part of High Achievers Academy to coach students. First time was a disaster, but with proper T3s(Train-The-Trainer) from the head coach, im getting better. The pay sounds good but don't be decieved. The number of hours that is put into prep and typing reports are horrible. In the end it just comes down to a okay pay only.

Trying kbox as night shift. Want to whack hard for Feb. So come March, i'll have enough cash cos my baby and I are planning a trip to HONGKONG! Woot. Been there before but it'll be a first experience tghtr for both of us.

But so far, im burning out. Really getting super tired i cant even walk home straight.
Cheers to all. Happy CNY too. Although i dun look forward to anything but the hongbaos.

2007-09-24T01:14:00.001-07:00

Take a breaK, have a chalet

Chalet with baby and her sis and her boyfriend etc

shortie

2007-08-24T10:42:00.000-07:00

Aint here for such a long time, sick of muggin.

Speaking of updates, i think we need one here. Let's see,
1. One and a half years of no life = rocking 2006/07 batch that got what we wanted =)))
2. One and a half years of no life = rotting studies
3. One and a half years of no life = rotting studies x 2
4. One and a half years of no life = intense mugging still cant catch up
5. One and a half years of life = the ultimate in friends and experience.

Thats about it. will come back more often hehe.
jiayou for ur revision everyone!!
esp my baby, ke lian so stressed. haha. hold on a little longer <3

2007-03-21T10:18:00.000-07:00

To accomplish what no one else can, you have to do what no one else dares.
i believe its the perfect time to push the limits of insane trainings we are suposedly well known for, both for myself and the team.

Damn im gonna hav to drop my nature and be tough =.=

1000 pushups?
1000 squats?
1000 crunches?
1000 leg raises?

thats just for warmups.

2007-02-21T10:41:00.000-08:00

i think i abandoned this place for soo long liao. lols. almost forgotten i had a blog.

anyway i juz came here to say i am officially back to 178cm. actually i was already there, but canoeing juz seems to make me grow shorter. fuck.

oh wells valentine's, CNY were juz over. haha im so lazy. jiu shi wun blog leh. what can u do? kidding.. other time bah.
guess the festive season is relli over.. im disgusted actually at how little holidays we have.

hmm.. im also starting to get sick of having so little time. *pukes*
baka

2006-10-04T18:23:00.000-07:00

whee!! finally. i can forget about all the DNA gemome and the lame operon.
anyways i think i retain liao. song bo.
lets recap. was late a bit for maths paper. KNN shdnt hav come lor. waste time. confirm fail de.
econs can pass bah?
chem still got hope.
so which leaves biology.
deciding factor.

dunno wad to do leh. feel like havoc my days away. den oso feel kinda no qi fen. cos got so many training!! but ting wan go so many places. dun worry baby, i'll b a superman and find the time =)) juz for yuu. hmm... we hav the penang trip! yay think the team can hav so much fun again le! and the seniors oso gg! haha can get to see them go crazy.
jiayou everybody!
back to rowing our boats.

row row row ur boats
gently down the stream
merrily merrily merrily ()
life is but a dreammm.

haha kk lame.

p.s. to anybody who feels depressed, plain sianed diaoed OOORRR out of lurvve. haha *wink wink*. mi always there to listen. even if i wun talk much wahaha. stay happy la. comeon, promos are over. fuckin CB, if u not happy. i punch ur face den u noe. heeh kiddin kiddin -.- ^^

lols my fone enterr water, spoil!

2006-08-26T09:09:00.000-07:00

TAgged by my darlin herself.
pfft make mi do extra work. especially EXACTLY after i finished my entry. wow tsk at the coincidence.
oh shes goin to arbish arbish me again (=

7 random facts about me
-i think i will go to a kind of heaven where jay music is on reapeat mode
-if i manage to end up in hell, hopefully jay music will still be on repeat mode
-i like pussies. (pls dun think dirty ;p
-i hate smokers
-slacker
-love playin the devil and seeing my pranks actually work
-i wan to hit 178 MinImUm
7 things that scare me
-heaven doesnt have jay music on repeat mode.
-seeing my great great grandfather
-seeing my grandma getting pregnant
-my ma and pa quarrel
-not being able to hit 1:50 in my raptor
-failing promos
-losing my darlin
7 fave songs
-wow i can actually save blog space! -.- need i say more?
7 things i like most
-darlin
-family
-friends
-life
-fun
-stars
-jAAy

7 people to do this (i dunno if u got do b4, if u hav forget it)
-hong kong bear
-green tea bro
-joshua
-sheng jie
-mei(v)
-miss teh tarik
- i juz realized its hard to find pple that actually visit my blog. so well. tata

2006-08-20T04:26:00.000-07:00

how i wish i dint hav to grow up.
/ \
/ / / / /__ __ __ __ | |
| ___ |
| | | |
| |. | |
| | | |

fuck even my house turned out squashed. lols.

if i cud juz figure out meaning.
i guess i wudnt be so sick of life.
sweet memories never do fade

do they?

happy belated bday to the bastard who got me my first school caning :)
hav fun dude. enjoy life while u still can :P:P

2006-08-17T09:38:00.002-07:00

Kagome: Neh inuyasha, imade mo youkai nenaritayo de?
Say inuyasha, do u still wanna become a youkai?
Inuyasha: Kah, hatayireme janega
Tche.. isnt it obvious?
Kagome: imadate jugon jiyonone..
But ur strong enuff already..
Inuyasha: Kah, desena orawa youkai nenaru
Be quiet.. i will become a youkai.

Kagome: watashiwa yima no maneno inuyusha des ka.
But.. i like u, da way u r.
*background music climaxes loudly* =))

imasugu ni ai ni kite

Mmmm.. bloody touched. but translating is long neh.
i love his " fuck off but i love u so much so i hav to push u away cos its too dangerous" face.

say.. what was i supposed to say next?
oh yea. life's not good. but my civics class is makin me laugh all day =DD esp bek's wife
off to tutorial 3.
before that.. everybody whos feelin screwed up juz say HEY! ITS GONNA BE A WONDERFUL DAY! PLS SAY JAY!! SWIM IN THE BAY!!AND FEED THE HORSE SOME HAYY!!!! cool i feel so much betta =)))

i love her. <3

2006-08-12T06:33:00.000-07:00

i shall blog twice today since im feelin hardworkin.
\dedicate this post to PREZ CHOU.
hehee.

OMFG. its once again the annual countdown to 18 SEPTEMBER.
argh.. WoW man i love this feelin. fuc its making mi very high now =)(=
since 八度空間 every fall or autumn will be his release. and man cant i wait! im goin bubbless.

This musical genius created a whole new entire genre of music! Its just styled as jay. But sadly, the King of Chinese pop industry is recieving critisms on his lack of new breakthroughs and creativity. Once again, i would like to stress that, what the fuck? he created this genre of music. That captivatin mumble that seems to rap so smoothly. Or the ballads that never fails to tug at you. This is his style. His genre. So why should he change? Comeon, you cant expect something new. Cos then, it wont be the prez anymore. In fact, i wish he woudn't be pressured to change cos of the media. I wish he was back to his old self.

been laughing my ass off since i read the forums.
excerpts...
现在延后到 9月20日以后再发，经纪人郑雪芬直言：“就是为了避开周杰伦啊!!
and
一不小心刚好就延后到9月8日，跟周董撞个正着，小美知道后先是惊讶地“啊”了一声，
and
虽然佩妮和周杰伦的属性不同，但周杰伦一发片，话题一定都在他身上啊，这样对我们那么辛苦做的音乐也不好
basically saying that even stars like these are afraid of jay. seriously cool.
they dun dare to release their albums on the same day.

argh im counting down.

2006-08-08T20:46:00.000-07:00

haha lols why am i sounding so negative?
i am so happy!
happy
happy
happy
i am delireee!
everybody rox!
show me ur happy!
lets party!!

no more negativity everyone. life is too short for that.

pls for fuck's sake. dun try to think TOo much.

juz bring on the laughter. and smiles.

juz who am i kidding? pfft

2006-08-02T07:17:00.000-07:00

arghh fuck. teachers seem to love houndin my ass.
and wtf i juz got labelled as the "burst suddenly den slow down, den suddenly burst then slow down" guy.

like wadeva. fuck. i'm like the most newbish in terms of experience among u guyz. and its a god damn raptor yea?? so spare me the slack. i have my own targets and i will meet them. u expect me to be super stable right now isit? -.-

juz realise this Club got some flaws. the critism seriously screws pple's confidence. juz seeing him getting kaobei'ed over and over breaks me up. damn!! it juz aint inborn in some pple. in fact, i love tokin cock with him. he's a damn nice guy la. juz lacks self confidence. unlike arrogant bastards out there in the world. jiayou man.. dun give up. dun listen to those critisms. i'll b right beside you.

fuck.. super pissed at everythin now. goin to mug it off. i hope.

2006-07-30T07:35:00.000-07:00

finally my neoprint deprived gurl had her fix

happyhappy day =)

p.s i dun wanna go back to reality tmr. and damn do fotos are blur

** sometimes when i wonder if there was a huge weighing scale to weigh out
on the right side the times when i brought smiles and warmth to pple's faces
and on the left the times when i brought tears and coldness.
i hope the right would be heavier

but fuck, if it isnt

god forgive me. for i am sorry.

2006-07-29T05:36:00.000-07:00

how i wish i was back in something more stable.. the feelin of rockin and twisting with no fear. its so old and worn-lookin compared to the raptor, but who cares. it held me. so screw dat raptor. its so sleek u can cap any second if u lose focus. and god.. i HATE it when i do.

i will relish the day when my raptor flies over water. i will get my 1:50.

when u try lookin back at da past ** years of ur life.. do u feel red? do u feel blue? or juz plain grey? well.. i would think of

my colourful life wearin dat blue beret certainly brings sweet blue memories.
anderson rox its yellow socks.
2/6 and 4/5 gang will forever be the craziest bunch of fuckin stupid orange gays i eva saw^^
the weeks that my father goes on his business trips will be greyish.
the days that i ended up sick muz be greenny
failure + sad days = black
workin at the chocolate factory makin brown chocolates, so my darlin can hav an extra special browny christmasss
all the red hongbaos that are certainly diminishin in size
and finally my baby boo makes me completely rainbow

certainly got so much others.. but as usual too lazy to type. lols dunno why i dun blog about my everyday events leh. mayb too garbled up. i'll try next time tho. haha

so much for the determination to mug. tata

2006-07-23T03:21:00.000-07:00

i've been neglecting so many things that are relli close to my heart. what a loser. cant handle ur own life. cant plan ur time properly. cant focus on the water. cant focus on studies. cant even find time with ur special gurl. what a fuckin loser. pls for god's sake. the championships are over. Get back ur focus. Make things work again.

i hate not being able to find time for u. it relli sucks. and now my grades are so f-ing screwed up. 2 U 2 E 1 B. issit? i oso not so sure. ArGh its like a hammer slammin on ur brain every second. stRess. wish i was still in anderson. lols. cant believe i was so hack care then. life was good. but i guess i juz gotta grow up. nid to let my gurl noe she aint wif a loser.

btw i noe things arent relli smooth btw us rite now. its juz stress bah. all the nerves. u r still and will always be the princess in my fairytale. ai shiteru.

2006-07-15T06:20:00.000-07:00

my mother juz nagged my ass off beacuse i dint " do this do that". get off my back pls. im sick. im stressed, im a boy who needs a 10 year break from life.

i love writing suicide notes juz to piss her off.

2006-07-15T05:44:00.000-07:00

realized somethin was wrong with my blog.. silly me. oh well i managed to revive it but lost all my previous posts. numbedd.

since the june hols started, everythin juz seemed to overflow. relli feels that im getting cramped up. with the hectic tranings, studies, etc. u noe how it feels when everythin is juz poised to break? juz crack like a silly eggshell. so MUCH GODAMN FUCKIN STUFF TO FUCKIN DO IN SUCH A FUCKIN LITTLE TIME. and you, i hurt u too.

i dint have time for you
i missed our important dates
i forgotten to write letters
i broke little promises
i made you tear
i regret leavin NY

sometimes when i hear sniffin noises when i tell u i cant meet you. or dat my weekends are booked. it juz breaks me. noeing dat at the other end of the line are ur droplets of tears. ='(

Once upon a time, a boy fell in love with a gurl.
she was all he wanted.
But he was afraid that she doesnt like him.
He silently waited for her.
And, the boy confessed to her.
He found his princess,
She found her knight.
He tinted her life with many colours.
Beautiful shades of happiness.
He was her source of energy, the one that kept her going.
He was always there to wipe her tears.
The one she leaned on when she was tired.
The shoulder that would always there for her.
He taught her how beautiful she was.
How lovely life was with her around.
They walked every street together. See the stars and moon, feel the presence of one another.
Time really flew.
All their memories captured within their hearts.
Life was simple, but magical.

But Love wasnt as easy as it seems, it's full of obstacles.
One day, he chose to go someplace else, he became further, seemed to drift away
It devastated him, he regretted in the end, but..

She learned to walk her every step without her knight. She tried to be independent. She went through all the ups and downs in her life. But she kept on falling, she stood up and walked. Just to fall again.

He felt pain in his heart every time he saw his baby cry out for him, cry out for the times he wasnt there and cudnt make it in time to be with her every second of her life. He was lost depressed and juz in tears..

After all they went through, it's still each other that appears in their mind. , hoping that life was like when they just met. How a little sandwich brightens one another's day. How a whisper of three words sweentened their nights. How he guide her way when she closed her eyes and held onto him. How he held her hands and glided thru the magical ice. How she managed to bring joy into his heart juz by walking home, thru the stalls near school. the walks home that he would die for now. the waits early in the innocent morning. 620

its hard but they love each other.

and thats what counts.

oops i kop from teh tariiik =))) but of cos i edited..

anyways. nat canoeing is over. when i saw our seniors, every inch of them prepared to die for the team. i felt relli touched. they hav gone thru in two years what little pple hav gone thru in thier entire lifetimes. the sufferings, the buckets of sweat and the rivers of blood. (lols i getting so drama)

im so happy that they succeeded. seeing them, in elation. understandin each other tots.. that hand on the back. the knowing smile.

its relli not about the title, the medals, or that we hav to prove ourselves. in the end the team that has gone thru so much bullshit with you. who has suffered and committed no less than you. who has pushed the very limits of thier body.they are more than your team. they are family.

in the end, when you meet that lactic acid barrier, ur muscles screamin in pain, your mind almost faintin with agony.
when it arrives at that crunch time.

it all comes down to rowin for who u love.

techniques and kickin and twisting and pullin i can forget
but the vales, the friendship, the bonds and the knowledge of knowing theres no limits i will not.

i shall be a master of my boat.
i shall mugggg my ass off.
i shall tell my kiss my baby goodnite every night.